I think I have a new habit. It's hard to know for sure; it's only been 2 weeks and I've heard it takes 21 days to establish a new habit. (Who comes up with this stuff? Probably someone who wrote a grant and then got paid to tell us that it takes exactly 21 days to establish a new habit! I want that job.)
Anyway, I'll rephrase. For the time being, I have a new interest which will last as long as I am being rewarded for doing it. (I'm basically a behaviorist--all human behavior happens because it is being reinforced.) This interest is walking for an hour, or more!, every morning.
I try to go at about 7:00, before it gets hot. I take a different neighborhood route every day--there are a plethora to choose from--and I think I must be walking a little faster because I seem to be travelling more and more ground.
If I choose a route that goes up a hill and challenges my legs, then I have to put up with the car exhaust from the lucky people who have jobs (actually, I sort of like not having to leave for work at 7:00, but don't tell any potential employers that). I've walked along the canal a few times lately and I like that. Lots of trees, running water, and I can talk to myself without any drivers thinking I'm crazy. Because I mean I talk to myself--outloud--not just think to myself. I also answer myself.
Sometimes, these talks are conversations with my Heavenly Father. I know people who might think that sounds weird or pretentious, but it's what I do. It seems more productive than kneeling by my bed, which I also do, because I can pause and reflect on what answers might be coming and there's not much chance I'll fall asleep.
Here's what I reflected on today:
1. My body is a temple. And just like the Boise Temple is being remodeled so that it works better, my body needs to be remodeled so that it works better. Both jobs will probably take a year. Yikes. I'm grateful for my friend who is doing minor remodeling on her own temple because I'm not sure I could do this alone.
2. I will continue to consider the lilies. My house payments will be made. Eventually.
3. As much as I hate the prospect, for a plethora of reasons (twice this blog for extra credit from the vocabulary fairy), I think I might want to get married again someday. I hope both temples are ready by then.
4. People have interesting expectations for me. I wasn't giving myself my MS shots once a week like I was supposed to, so my doctor changed to a different type that I should be giving myself 3 times a week. I wasn't doing my visiting teaching with 3 sisters so my very good friend the Relief Society president gave my partner and me 6 sisters. hmmmm The higher expectations are probably for my own good.
5. I really do love my children more than they will ever know. Sometimes they need me more than other times and that's fine. In fact, that's the plan. One of the roles I hope for is to always be a mother who knows when she's needed and when she's not and doesn't mix up her needs for theirs.
That's about it. Not a bad walk.